Before my Dad died, he requested the he be buried in Chester, Idaho! Chester is a TINY little place, with a few houses, a vacant convenient store, and of course a cemetery. Among those buried there are, Lionel Clifford Hathaway, My dads Grandpa and name sake. My dads Great Grandparents, John Wesley and Adyline Clifford Hathaway-by childrens namesakes, and their daughter- Deborah Jane.
When I was a kid, the cemetery was surrounded by an old, unsturdy fence that my Grandpa Hathaway had built. It was a place forgotten by most--the headstones there were barely readable, and there was fear that one day the fence would come down and some how that part of the cemetery would be forgotten and eventually--gone. My dad always had a special place in his heart for that place, I think it was because his dad cared so much about it. We would go there every memorial day and plant flowers and clean around the graves. It became a family tradition. Dad cared so much that about 8 years ago, he bought new headstones for all of the graves there. After LOTS of calls to the cemetery board, we finally got them to put a new vinyl fence around it.
When Dad told me that he wanted to be buried in Chester, I cried--and cried! I had felt the fear of having my dad there--in the middle of nowhere. But, he was insistent that he be there. He got his wish! He is buried there between his Grandpa and Great Grandpa, with a beautiful view of the Grand Tetons.
Around Christmas time, Dad got his headstone. It is beautiful and it reminds me of him. I still have a hard time believing he is actually gone--the headstone almost made it all more real. I still get a lump in my throat when I see it, and I still have to remind myself that he is gone.
I visit whenever I am in Idaho--and I try to make sure he knows that he is not forgotten! Its silly really, because I know that he isn't actually there--but somehow I feel closer to him when I visit. Aiden likes to leave presents for Grandpa when we visit. He wrote a post card to tell him all about North Dakota so that he knew where we had been!
I was home for Valentines day, and I was able to take a Valentine to my very first Valentine! :) I miss him--Not a day goes by that I don't miss the "old" him--the pre-new wife him, the pre-cancer him. The him that he was to me! The him that I wished everyone could remember him as! Someday, I hope to understand the reasons that bad things happen, and why things work out the way they do!
